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TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE IMPEACHMENT
'Twas The Night Before Impeachment,
when all through the House,
The full Congress was stirring, even
Conyers, the louse.
The Articles were hung by the Capitol
with care,
In hopes that Saint Bubba would be
trapped in the lair.
The Republicans were nestled, all
smug with The Feds,
While visions of perjury danced in
their heads.
And Barr with his rhetoric and Hyde
with his trap,
Had just settled in for a long
evening's nap.
When out in The Gulf, there arose
such a clatter
They clicked on CNN to see what was
the matter.
When what to their wondering eyes
should appear
But Tomahawk cruise missiles flying
like reindeer.
With a Presidential address, so
lively and quick,
They knew in a moment, it must be
Saint Slick!
More rapid than eagles, his
supporters they came,
And he whistled and shouted and
called them by name:
"Now Conyers, now Gephardt, let's
forget about The Vixen!
On Barney! On Maxine! I'm no Richard
Nixon!!!"
"From Capitol Hill to the Washington
Mall,
Now dash away, dash away, dash away
all!!!"
And then the Republicans heard on the
roof
The prancing and pawing of each
little hoof.
As they scratched their heads and
were turning around
The resilient Saint Willie scored
another rebound.
No longer was he eating from his
humble pie,
While assaulting Saddam with his
bombs from the sky.
A bundle of weapons he had flung at
Iraq,
It looked once again like Slick
Willie was back.
His eyes, how they twinkled! His
dimples, how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose
like a cherry.
His droll little mouth was drawn up
like a bow,
And the hair on his head was as white
as the snow.
The stump of a stogie, he held tight
in his teeth,
And the smoke, it encircled his head
like a wreath.
He had a broad face and a little
round belly
That shook when he laughed like a
bowl full of jelly.
He was chubby and plump - a right
jolly old elf,
And the Republicans wept, in spite of
themselves.
And a wink of his eye and a twist of
his head
Soon gave them to know they had
something to dread.
He spoke the right words and went
straight to his work
Hard to believe that an Intern once
called him "The Jerk."
And shaking his finger and thumbing
his nose,
By "Wagging The Dog," up the polls he
rose.
He turned to his spinmeisters and
gave them a whistle,
Then they cheered-on Slick Willie as
he launched another missile.
They all heard him exclaim, with
Impeachment out of sight,
"Happy Ramadan to all, and to all a
good night."
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